All That I Can't Leave Behind
by faithinthecharm
Summary: A mixed bag based on gossip I've heard about the new series. Maybe here be SPOILERS, but maybe not. Covers a lot of bases. Chapter 1 will be the proper summary, if you don't know/want to know about the supposed central thread for the new series don't read
1. summary

All that I can't leave behind.

A bit of a mixed bag based on gossip I've heard about the new series. So possibly here be SPOILERS, but maybe not. Covers a lot of bases. Chapter 1 will be the proper summary, if you know nothing about the supposed central thread for the new series do not read.

Based around the possible college shooting plot within the new series, all other developments are suppositions by the author. I do not own Casualty. I'm just playing with the BBC's toys.

Lenny meets a young woman who astounds him and makes him push his ethics again.

Yuki's new strength draws attention.

Ruth decides, but where will her heart lead her and who will she hurt?

Tess crashes into depression, torn between her faith and her friendship for Charlie, will the new Pastor help her make up her mind?

Charlie and Shona juggle Louis' return with raising baby Megan.

Nick and Zoe struggle to survive, and a blast from Zoe's past reminds her how strong she can be.

We find out the truth of Kirsty's home life as Big Mac and come to her rescue

And the new paramedic in town proves to be a life changer for Polly, Jeff and Dixie.


	2. Chapter 2

I own nothing. I'm just playing with the BBC's toys, sorry it's taken so long, my world went mad. Please read and review as this is my first Casualty fic and my first fic in a wee while.

**Chapter One**

**Morning is not a time for thinking**

**Lenny**

Dr Lenny Lyons was still losing the battle with his conscience. The birth of baby Megan had brought the two of them to the stage where they could at least talk to each other now, even if it was just to bicker over the choice of name that wasn't taken up anyway. However as he looked at himself in the mirror before he left for work, he was still the guy who had lied to everyone and near enough blackmailed people to get what he wanted. The guy who had stepped over a person he loved like a brother and put peoples lives at risk to save himself. This hadn't been the plan all that time ago. Who the hell was he? He wasn't so sure any more and that scared him. He ran a hand over his face and stepped out into the rain.

**Ruth**

Ruth turned over and looked at Edward as he slept beside her, snoring slightly. She sighed, weren't you supposed to find that endearing in the man you'd just married? She didn't really know. All she did know was the best she felt was in that second when you wake up but you're not awake and the world can be whatever you want, and she could kid herself she was sleeping next to the person she should have been next to.

Ruth drew in a shaking breath and got up, moving into the bathroom and tried to clear the image of the dream she'd just had, of her and Jay at the town hall, her hand resting on a bump that in real life she'd sacrificed for a job that was never hers. As usual, since she'd lived with Edward, she stepped into the shower to cry. Edward never noticed, and her daily prayer went unanswered.

**Yuki**

Yuki's nose still hurt, and his eye seemed to be oddly fuzzy, but he was pretty sure that was because the alignment of the lens was out. He wondered what Hiro would think of him now he had finally 'grown a pair'. Would it make any difference? If May...No forget her. He had to start as he meant to go on and start wanting to be a doctor for himself. And he did now...Nearly.

**Jay**

Was this a rebound? He wasn't sure, he liked Polly, he really did and he was worried that he was about to mess up a really decent friendship. Surely it wasn't a rebound unless he felt like it was. And he wasn't still in love with Ruth. She was the one who'd rebounded, straight into that...No, he didn't care enough to get angry. It hadn't destroyed him, and he wasn't torn in half. He sighed and scraped his dark hair back as he left Polly's apartment, with both of them having agreed it was no strings. One problem though, he had strings, he just wasn't sure who they joined him to.

**Charlie**

The sound of a baby crying wasn't supposed to bring joy to the heart of a man who worked shifts and really wasn't old enough to be called Grandad, but it did. Charlie hadn't been this happy in years. He just wished Louis was around to pull his weight.

**Zoe**

Zoe hadn't even bothered to say goodbye as she walked out of the door. She wasn't even sure what she was still doing at that house. She'd kept her own flat on with the intention of renting it out, so she could just go home. She lit her second cigarette of the day, as she walked to her car. Yes, she did know what she was still doing here. She loved Nick Jordan, through everything, she always had, and damn he was hard work, but she wasn't ready to give up yet.

**Nick**

Nick Jordan flinched as the door slammed. Not a sound from her. He missed the sound of her voice, and he wanted things to be better. She'd done so much for him, he was alive because of her, even if she'd lied to do it. However, that lie was too big, and he wasn't able to forgive her yet. Even if he missed the sound of her voice so much it hurt.

**Big Mac**

Mackenzie Chalk, more than just a porter, or a former soldier. He wasn't just a big man, or the department clown. He was a good man, who missed his Mam, and who was cleverer than he was ever given credit for. One of these days he'd get to prove himself.

**Noel**

Noel woke slowly, and then realised...his alarm hadn't gone off. He was late, really bloody late. He wasn't in the mood to put up with the Tess Bateman death glare this morning, but if he was lucky Big Mac would have covered for him.

**Polly**

Polly tried to stop smiling. They promised no strings, and she knew when Jeff and Dixie found out... Well, it was like having an extra set of parents, and she knew that Jeff would be threatening Jay with violence before the end of the day, and Dixie, would probably just be committing it, if she told them. She knew they'd know something had happened, they weren't blind, so it was more a case of what to edit out.

**Jeff**

Jeff had decided not to even bother arguing with Dixie for the bathroom. He sat in the kitchen eating toast and slipping Little Abs bits of toast on the sly. Him and Dix was an odd set up, straight guy, gay girl, marriage certificate. But it worked for them, except about the bathroom. Jeff stood and slowly deliberately, switched on the hot tap on the kitchen.

**Dixie**

Dixie let out a shriek as the water switched from lovely and warm to freezing. She swore loudly and threw herself out of the shower, cursing again as she heard Jeff laughing downstairs. If he'd been like this with his ex wife then just for once she felt sorry for the woman, but only for a second. Thank God she didn't have to sleep with him.

**Tess**

Tess had been awake for hours. She was still barely sleeping, memories of watching Megan die rearing up over and over again as horrific nightmares. Eventually she had given up, the silent house making her jumpy, and moved towards work, hoping the noise and people in the place would distract her.

**Kirsty**

Kirsty had dropped her daughter off at school and headed to work. After the last few days she felt a little better working at Holby since her and Tess had settled down. It was freedom, a secret to be kept, where she could be herself

**Adam**

Adam smiled as he woke, just for a second not remembering. He was pretending at work that he was fine, and if he was honest, he was getting better. He missed Jess and the kids, and the pain of losing Harry would never go away, but those seconds when he woke up... they were getting longer.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Two**

**Not Just A Day That Ends In Y**

Natalia was an art teacher. No one had expected her to be brave, but when the first shot rang out, her world changed. She'd not really thought about it as she began to move, there were kids out there and all she could really consider was that in the corridor and beyond. Her head shot up as shots sounded again. Oh God, she had hoped to never hear that sound again.

Natalia walked out into the corridor, her dark hair a curtain across her face. Her tiny frame made her indistinguishable from the students, and unbeknownst to her put her at a higher risk. She kept walking, in spite of her brain telling her to run, she had to do something, to protect the kids. She could smell blood as she drew closer to the source of the noise. Her eyes settled on a fallen pupil, not an art student, but she recognised his face...Oh what was his name? She glanced at his face, unable to bring herself to look at him properly. He didn't scream, didn't move...didn't breathe, his eyes told her he was dead. The light in them was gone, there was no soul there any more, they were like glass. Natalia pressed her hand over her mouth to stop a sob and crouched beside him, checking his pulse as she had been taught in first aid.

Her prayer for the flicker of life beneath her fingers went unanswered. Nathan...his name was Nathan, his girlfriend was in her Friday morning class, he waited for her, that's where she knew him from. She muttered a soft prayer, slipping back into her native Russian in her fear, and carefully closed his eyes.

Natalia rose, pressing on, the smell of blood still in her nose, the sound of the bang echoing in her head, from so long ago. Her father...that streak of red on a white wall, her mother, "Come away Talia." She barely noticed the further shots as her memory took her away, even as she still walked, stopping as she watched a boy in a dark coat lowering a weapon. She snapped back, watching him level the weapon again. "You need to stop this." She called to him, aware her voice was shaking showing how terrified she was. "I'm sure we can sort everything out, if you just stop." He turned, this boy, slight, skinny, a child...with a gun. "Please...I'm sure this was all a mistake...Please..." She hadn't finished the last 'please' before the pain hit her. A bullet in the gut. Her eyes locked with the girl on the stage, whose partner lay shot nearby. Natalia smiled slightly at the younger girl before she folded, unable to stand as she began to bleed out.

Holby City hospital had just received the call telling them the world was about to fall apart, as Jeff stumbled through the swing door at the opposite end of the performance space as the shooter walked away.


End file.
